July 2011
I am never drinking again
This time I mean it!
… No I dont.
“Any society that would call a goddess like Kate Winslet “fat” is...”
– My boyfriend
That picture I posted of all my sparkly bedazzled...
WAT moment
Clearly, people like jeweled tits
Made it to Australia!!!!
The flight was hell. The airplane food made me constipated, and my deodorant stopped working five hours into a 13 hour red-eye flight. And I had packed it in my luggage. I felt bad for the people sitting on either side of me for having to endure my stench, but not too bad since I was the only one of them who didn’t get any sleep.
I’m also already annoyed with my travel companion. But...
Oprah makes $315,000,000/yr = $26,000,000/month =...
lmaogtfo:
krouss:
scriptures:
And Bill Gates earns $ 5.5 Billion a year, which is $458.333 Million a month, which is $105.769 Million a week, which is $15.110 million a day which is $629,578 an hour, which is $10,492 a minute, which is $174.88 a second.
What now Oprah?
And Carlos Slim Helu earns $9.6 billion a year.
which is $805,306,362.20 per month
which is $26,843,545.44 per...
Packing is stressful!
And it forces you to ask yourself the difficult questions in life.
Like, do I need to bring my snuggie?
Could there be weed in any pockets of anything I’ve just packed? Is it worth unpacking everything just to check?
Should I leave my vodka at my parent’s house and trust they wont drink it, or leave it with a trustworthy friend, who I know will only drink it if they are already too...
"Feminists have no sense of humour."
Of course I have a sense of humour. Would I be talking to you if you weren’t such a joke?
2 tags
AUSTRALIANS/PEOPLE WHO HAVE TRAVELED A LOT: I...
My flight to Australia is in 3 days. Naturally, I’m packing. Naturally, I’m also freaking out
What are some things that you would say YES, BRING THIS or EVERYONE ALWAYS FORGETS THIS BRING IT? Because this is my first trip sans parents/guardians/group and I’ll be totally free to fail
WHAT DO I BRING?????
Anonymous asked: How did you bedazzle the bras?? SO CUTEEEE!<333
8 tags
Anonymous asked: Over the course of the last week, I've gone through every single page of your blog. I hope you know how encouraging and motivational you are! Tumblr truly needs more body positive blogs like yours! (: P.S. DO IT!!
A Modern Sexual-Assault Tale
Man: Hello, I'd like to report a mugging.
Officer: A mugging, eh? Where did it take place?
Man: I was walking by 21st and Dundritch Street and a man pulled out a gun and said, "Give me all your money."
Officer: And did you?
Man: Yes, I co-operated.
Officer: So you willingly gave the man your money without fighting back, calling for help or trying to escape?
Man: Well, yes, but I was terrified. I thought he was going to kill me!
Officer: Mmm. But you did co-operate with him. And I've been informed that you're quite a philanthropist, too.
Man: I give to charity, yes.
Officer: So you like to give money away. You make a habit of giving money away.
Man: What does that have to do with this situation?
Officer: You knowingly walked down Dundritch Street in your suit when everyone knows you like to give away money, and then you didn't fight back. It sounds like you gave money to someone, but now you're having after-donation regret. Tell me, do you really want to ruin his life because of your mistake?
Man: This is ridiculous!
Officer: This is a rape analogy. This is what women face every single day when they try to bring their rapists to justice.
Man: Fuck the patriarchy.
Officer: Word.
2 tags
Partner just dropped a number of not-so-subtle...
Can’t say I blame him. My usual pj’s consist of the giant men’s XXL bright yellow hockey t-shirt that hangs to my knees, paired with Simpsons boxers.
